Isiqwenga esibhalwe ngu Boys to Men

                  Nangona kukho iingxoxo ezininzi malunga nezikhumbuzo zexesha lemfazwe yamakhaya, imbongi yaseNashville uCaroline Williams kutshanje uye wasikhumbuza ngendima edla ngokungasiwa so kulo mba: udlwengulo, nenkcubeko yokudlwengula. Kwi-OpEd enesihloko esithi, "Ngaba uyafuna iSikhumbuzo soMdibaniso? Umzimba wam lilitye lesikhumbuzo leNdibaniselwano,” ucinga ngembali emva komthunzi wesikhumba sakhe esimdaka ngokukhanyayo. "Ngokubhekiselele kwimbali yosapho, kwaye njengoko uvavanyo lweDNA lwanamhlanje luye lwandivumela ukuba ndiqinisekise, ndiyinzala yabasetyhini abamnyama ababengabasebenzi basekhaya kunye namadoda amhlophe adlwengula uncedo lwabo." Umzimba wakhe kunye nokubhala kusebenza kunye njengokujongana neziphumo zokwenyani zemiyalelo yentlalontle ethi i-US ixabise ngokwesiko, ngakumbi xa kufikwa kwiindima zesini. Ngaphandle kobuninzi bedatha evelayo edibanisa intlalo yesini yamakhwenkwe kuluhlu lweengxaki zempilo yoluntu kunye nobundlobongela, namhlanje, kulo lonke elaseMelika, amakhwenkwe ahlala ekhuliswa ngokwegunya lesikolo saseMelika: "indoda phezulu."

                   Ukuvezwa kukaWilliams kwangethuba nangexesha elisemngciphekweni kwimbali yosapho lwakhe kusikhumbuza ukuba ukuthotyelwa ngokwesini kunye nobuhlanga bezisoloko zihamba kunye. Ukuba sifuna ukujongana nayo nayiphi na into, kufuneka sijongane nayo yomibini. Inxalenye yokwenza oko kukuqonda ukuba kukho kakhulu iqhelekile izinto kunye nezenzo ezichitha ubomi bethu bemihla ngemihla namhlanje eMelika eziqhubeka nokuxhasa inkcubeko yodlwengulo. Oku akukho malunga nemifanekiso eqingqiweyo, uWilliams uyasikhumbuza, kodwa malunga nendlela esifuna ukunxulumana ngayo ngokuhlangeneyo kwiinkqubo zembali zolawulo ezithethelela kwaye ziqhele ubundlobongela obuphathelele kwezesondo.

                   Ngokomzekelo, khawuthabathe umdlalo ohlekisayo wothando, apho inkwenkwe eyaliwe yenza umgudu wobugorha ukuze izuze uthando lwentombazana engenamdla kuyo—esoyisa inkcaso yayo ekugqibeleni ngesenzo sothando esibalaseleyo. Okanye iindlela amakhwenkwe aphakanyiswa ngayo ngenxa yokulala ngesondo, nokuba yintoni na iindleko. Ngokwenene, iimpawu esihlala sizimilisela kumakhwenkwe aselula mihla le, ezinxibelelene neengcamango ekudala kukho “amadoda okwenene,” zisisiseko esingenakuphepheka senkcubeko yodlwengulo.

                   Iseti efihlakeleyo, ehlala ingaphononongwa, yemilinganiselo equlethwe kwikhowudi yenkcubeko ethi “umntu phezulu” yinxalenye yendawo apho amadoda aqeqeshelwa ukuqhawuka nokuthoba iimvakalelo, ukuzukisa amandla kunye nokuphumelela, kunye nokubonisana ngenkohlakalo amandla omnye nomnye. ukuphinda le migaqo. Ukutshintsha uvakalelo lwam kumava abanye (kunye nawam) kunye nesigunyaziso sokuphumelela nokufumana okwam yindlela endifunde ngayo ukuba yindoda. Uqheliselo oluqhelekileyo lokulawula lunxulumanisa ibali likaWilliams nezithethe ezikhoyo namhlanje xa inkwenkwana eneminyaka emi-3 ubudala ithotywa isidima ngumntu omdala emthandayo ngenxa yokulila xa esiva intlungu, uloyiko, okanye uvelwano: “Amakhwenkwe akalili. ” (amakhwenkwe ayazilahla iimvakalelo).

                  Nangona kunjalo, intshukumo yokuphelisa ukuzukiswa kokulawula iyakhula, nayo. ETucson, kwiveki enikiweyo, kuzo zonke izikolo ezikwingingqi ezili-17 nakwiZiko lokuGcinwa kwaBantwana, malunga nama-60 aqeqeshiweyo, amadoda amadala asuka kwiindawo ngeendawo ahlala phantsi ukuze athathe inxaxheba kwisangqa sokuncokola namakhwenkwe akwishumi elivisayo amalunga nama-200 njengenxalenye yomsebenzi wamakhwenkwe Amadoda Tucson. Kuninzi lwaba bafana, le kuphela kwendawo ebomini babo apho kukhuselekile ukuphoxeka, ukuthetha inyaniso ngendlela abaziva ngayo, nokucela inkxaso. Kodwa ezi ntlobo zamanyathelo kufuneka zifumane amandla angakumbi kuzo zonke iindawo zoluntu lwethu ukuba siza kuthatha indawo yesiko lodlwengulo ngenkcubeko yemvume ekhuthaza ukhuseleko nobulungisa kumntu wonke. Sifuna uncedo lwakho ekwandiseni lo msebenzi.

                Ngo-Okthobha wama-25, 26, kunye nama-28, i-Boys to Men Tucson ibambisene ne-Emerge, iYunivesithi yase-Arizona kunye nemanyano yamaqela asekuhlaleni azinikeleyo ukubamba iqonga elibalulekileyo elijolise ekuququzeleleni uluntu lwethu ukudala iindlela ezingcono kakhulu ezingcono kumakhwenkwe akwishumi elivisayo kunye namadoda- ulutsha oluchongiweyo. Lo msitho wokusebenzisana uya kuntywila nzulu kwimikhosi eyakha ubudoda kunye nentlalontle yeemvakalelo kubantu abatsha baseTucson. Le yindawo ephambili apho ilizwi lakho kunye nenkxaso yakho inokusinceda senze umehluko omkhulu kuhlobo lwenkcubeko ekhoyo kwisizukulwana esilandelayo xa kuziwa kwisini, ukulingana kunye nobulungisa. Siyakumema ukuba uhlanganyele nathi kweli nyathelo lisebenzayo elibhekiselele ekukhuliseni uluntu apho ukhuseleko kunye nobulungisa buyinto eqhelekileyo, endaweni yokukhetha. Ukufumana ulwazi oluthe vetshe ngeqonga, okanye ukubhalisa ukubakho, nceda undwendwele www.btmtucson.com/masculinityforum2020.

                  Lo ngumzekelo nje omnye wentshukumo enkulu yokuhlakulela ukuxhathisa kothando kwiinkqubo eziqhelekileyo zenkcubeko yolawulo. U-Angela Davis onguMtshabalalisi ubonakalise olu tshintsho ngcono xa wayeguqula umthandazo ozolileyo entloko, esithi, “Andisazamkeli izinto endingenako ukuzitshintsha. Nditshintsha izinto endingenakuzamkela.” Njengoko sicinga ngefuthe lobundlobongela basekhaya nobesondo kuluntu lwethu kule nyanga, yanga sonke singaba nesibindi kunye nokuzimisela ukulandela isikhokelo sakhe.

    Malunga namakhwenkwe ukuya emadodeni

    UMBONO

    Umbono wethu kukuqinisa uluntu ngokubiza amadoda ukuba anyuse izinga lokufundisa amakhwenkwe afikisayo kuhambo lwawo olusingise ebudodeni obusempilweni.

    MISSION

    Injongo yethu kukugaya, ukuqeqesha, kunye nokuxhobisa uluntu lwamadoda ukuba afundise amakhwenkwe afikisayo ngokusebenzisa izangqa ezikwisiza, uhambo lokuhamba, kunye namasiko angoku okudlula.