Ucezu olubhalwe ngabafana kubafana

                  Ngenkathi kube nempikiswano eningi mayelana nezikhumbuzo zesikhathi sempi yombango, imbongi yaseNashville uCaroline Williams usanda kusikhumbuza ngesigxobo esivame ukunganakwa kule nkinga: ukudlwengula, kanye nesiko lokudlwengula. Ku-OpEd enesihloko esithi, "Ufuna Isikhumbuzo Se-Confederate? Umzimba Wami Uyisikhumbuzo se-Confederate, ”Ucabanga ngomlando wesikhumba sakhe esinsundu ngokukhanyayo. "Ngokuya ngomlando womndeni, futhi njengoba ukuhlolwa kwesimanje kwe-DNA kungivumele ukuthi ngiqinisekise, ngiyinzalo yabesifazane abamnyama ababeyizisebenzi zasendlini kanye nabelungu abadlwengula usizo lwabo." Umzimba wakhe nokubhala kusebenza ndawonye njengokubhekana nemiphumela eyiqiniso yemiyalo yezenhlalo i-US ebilokhu iyazisa, ikakhulukazi uma kukhulunywa ngezindima zobulili. Ngaphandle kwenani eliqinile lemininingwane evelayo exhumanisa ukuzibandakanya kobulili bendabuko kwabafana ezinhlobonhlobo zezinkinga zempilo yomphakathi nodlame, namuhla, kulo lonke elaseMelika, abafana basavame ukukhuliswa ngomyalo wesikole esidala waseMelika: "vuka."

                   Ukudalulwa kukaWilliams ngesikhathi esifanele nokusengozini emlandweni womndeni wakhe kusikhumbuza ukuthi ukuzithoba ngokobulili nangokobuhlanga bekuhlale kuhambisana. Uma sifuna ukubhekana nazo zombili, kufanele sibhekane nazo zombili. Ingxenye yokwenza lokho ukubona ukuthi kukhona kakhulu kujwayelekile izinto nemikhuba engcolisa impilo yethu yansuku zonke eMelika eqhubeka nokuxhasa isiko lokudlwengula. Lokhu akumayelana nezithombe, uWilliams uyasikhumbuza, kodwa mayelana nokuthi sifuna ukuhlangana kanjani ngokubambisana nemikhuba yomlando yokubusa evumela futhi yehlise udlame lwezocansi.

                   Thatha isibonelo, amahlaya othando, lapho umfana onqatshiwe eya ebangeni lobuqhawe ukuze anqobe uthando lwentombazane engenayo intshisekelo yakhe — ukunqoba ukumelana kwakhe nayo ekugcineni ngesenzo esihle sothando. Noma izindlela eziphakanyiswa ngazo abafana zokuya ocansini, noma ngabe iziphi izindleko. Ngempela, izici esivame ukungena kuzo kubafana abancane nsuku zonke, ezixhumene nemibono yakudala mayelana "namadoda angempela," ziyisisekelo esingenakugwemeka sosiko lokudlwengula.

                   Isisekelo samanani asobala, avame ukungahlolisiswa, aqukethwe yikhodi yamasiko ethi “man up” ayingxenye yendawo lapho amadoda eqeqeshelwa khona ukunqamula emandleni futhi ehlise imizwa, ukukhazimulisa amandla nokuwina, nokuphathisa ngonya ikhono lomunye nomunye ukuphindaphinda lezi zinkambiso. Ukufaka ukuzwela kwami ​​kokuhlangenwe nakho kwabanye (nokwami) ngegunya lokuwina ngithole okwami ​​yindlela engifunde ngayo ukuba yindoda. Imikhuba ejwayelekile yokubusa ihlobanisa indaba noWilliams ayixoxa namasiko akhona namuhla lapho umfanyana oneminyaka emithathu ubudala ehlazeka ngumuntu omdala amthandayo ngokukhala lapho ezwa ubuhlungu, ukwesaba, noma uzwela: “abafana abakhali ”(Abafana balahla imizwa).

                  Kodwa-ke, ukunyakaza kokuqeda ukukhazinyuliswa kombuso kuyakhula, futhi. ETucson, ngesonto elinikeziwe, ezikoleni zendawo eziyi-17 naseJuvenile Detention Centre, cishe amadoda angama-60 aqeqeshiwe, amadoda amadala aqhamuka kuyo yonke imiphakathi ahlala phansi abambe iqhaza emibuthanweni ekhuluma nabafana ababalelwa ku-200 abasebasha njengengxenye yomsebenzi wabafana Abesilisa iTucson. Kwabaningi balaba bafana, le ukuphela kwendawo empilweni yabo lapho kuphephile khona ukuyeka ukuqapha kwabo, ukukhuluma iqiniso ngendlela abazizwa ngayo, nokucela ukuxhaswa. Kepha lezi zinhlelo zidinga ukuthola ukuthambeka okuningi kuzo zonke izingxenye zomphakathi wethu uma sizosusa isiko lokudlwengula ngesiko lokuvuma elikhuthaza ukuphepha nobulungiswa kubo bonke. Sidinga usizo lwakho ukwandisa lo msebenzi.

                Ngo-Okthoba 25, 26, no-28, i-Boys to Men Tucson ibambisene ne-Emerge, i-University of Arizona kanye nenhlangano yamaqembu omphakathi azinikele ekusingatheni isithangami esivusa amadlingozi okuhloswe ngaso ukuhlela imiphakathi yethu ukudala izindlela ezingcono kakhulu zabafana abesilisa nabesilisa- intsha ekhonjiwe. Lo mcimbi wokuxoxisana uzongena ngokujulile emandleni ahlela ubudoda kanye nenhlalakahle engokomzwelo yabantu abasha eTucson. Lesi isikhala esisemqoka lapho izwi lakho nokuxhaswa kwakho kungasisiza khona ukwenza umehluko omkhulu ohlotsheni lwamasiko akhona esizukulwaneni esilandelayo uma kukhulunywa ngobulili, ukulingana, nobulungiswa. Sikumema ukuba uhlanganyele nathi ngalesi sinyathelo esiwusizo sokuhlakulela umphakathi lapho ukuphepha nobulungiswa kuyinsakavukela, kunokuba kube ngaphandle. Ngeminye imininingwane esithangamini, noma ukubhalisela ukuhambela, sicela uvakashele www.btmtucson.com/masculinityforum2020.

                  Lesi yisibonelo esisodwa sokunyakaza okukhulu ukuhlakulela ukumelana kothando nezinhlelo ezijwayelekile zamasiko wokubusa. U-Angela Davis, isazi sokuqeda isizungu, wakubona kahle kakhulu lokhu kushintsha lapho eguqula umthandazo wokuthula ekhanda, eqinisekisa, “Angisazamukeli izinto engingakwazi ukuzishintsha. Ngishintsha izinto engingakwazi ukuzamukela. ” Njengoba sibheka umthelela wodlame lwasekhaya nolwezocansi emiphakathini yethu kule nyanga, kwangathi sonke singaba nesibindi futhi sizimisele ukulandela ukuhola kwakhe.

    Mayelana nabafana emadodeni

    UMBONO

    Umbono wethu ukuqinisa imiphakathi ngokubiza abesilisa ukuba basukume bafundise abafana abasakhula ohambweni lwabo lokuya ebudodeni obuphilile.

    UBIZO

    Umsebenzi wethu ukunxenxa, ukuqeqesha, nokunika amandla imiphakathi yamadoda ukweluleka abafana abasebasha ngemijikelezo esizeni, ukuphuma kwezokuvakasha, kanye namasiko esikhathi samanje.