NgaMadoda Ayeka Ubundlobongela

    I-Emerge Centre Against Domestic Abuse yobunkokeli ekugxininiseni amava amanina aMnyama ngeNyanga yoKwazisa ngoBundlobongela baseKhaya iyasikhuthaza kuMadoda aNqanda ubuNdlobongela.

    Cecelia Jordan's Ubulungisa buqala apho uBundlobongela ngakubafazi abaMnyama buphela -impendulo kuCaroline Randall Williams' Umzimba wam lilitye lesikhumbuzo leNdibaniselwano -Inika indawo entle yokuqala.

    Kwiminyaka eyi-38, amadoda ayeka ubundlobongela asebenze ngokuthe ngqo namadoda e-Atlanta, eGeorgia nakwilizwe lonke ukuphelisa ubundlobongela obujoliswe kwabasetyhini. Amava ethu asifundise ukuba akukho ndlela eya phambili ngaphandle kokuphulaphula, ukuthetha inyaniso kunye nokuphendula.

    KwiNkqubo yethu yoNgenelelo lwe-Batterer (BIP) sifuna ukuba amadoda achaze ngeenkcukacha ezithe ngqo iindlela zokulawula kunye nempatho gadalala ayisebenzisileyo kunye neziphumo zokuziphatha kumaqabane, abantwana kunye noluntu. Asiyenzeli into yokuhlazisa amadoda. Endaweni yoko, sicela amadoda ukuba azijonge ngokungagungqiyo ukuze afunde iindlela ezintsha zokuba sehlabathini nokudala iindawo zokuhlala ezikhuselekileyo kumntu wonke. Sifunde ukuba – emadodeni – uxanduva notshintsho ekugqibeleni lukhokelela kubomi obanelisayo. Njengoko sithetha eklasini, awunakuyitshintsha ude uyinike igama.

    Kwakhona sibeka phambili ukuphulaphula kwiiklasi zethu. Amadoda afunda ukuva amazwi abasetyhini ngokucamngca kumanqaku afana neentsimbi zentsimbi ' Intando Yokutshintsha kunye neevidiyo ezifana no-Aisha Simmons ' HAYI! Uxwebhu lodlwengulo. Amadoda aziqhelanisa nokuphulaphula ngaphandle kokuphendula njengoko enika ingxelo omnye komnye. Asifuni ukuba amadoda avumelane noko kuthethwayo. Kunoko, amadoda afunda ukuphulaphula ukuze aqonde oko omnye umntu akutshoyo nokubonakalisa intlonelo.

    Ngaphandle kokuphulaphula, siya kukwazi njani ukuyiqonda ngokupheleleyo imiphumo yezenzo zethu kwabanye? Sinokuyifunda njani indlela yokuqhuba ngeendlela ezibeka phambili ukhuseleko, ubulungisa nokuphilisa?

    Le migaqo minye yokuphulaphula, ukuthetha inyaniso kunye nokuphendula iyasebenza kuluntu nakwinqanaba loluntu. Basebenza ekupheliseni ubuhlanga obucwangcisiweyo kunye nokuchasana noBumnyama njengokuba besenza ukuphelisa ubundlobongela basekhaya nobesondo. Imiba iyathungelana.

    In Ubulungisa buqala apho uBundlobongela ngakubafazi abaMnyama buphela, uNks. Jordan udibanisa amachaphaza phakathi kobuhlanga kunye nobundlobongela basekhaya nobesondo.

    UNksz Jordan ucela umngeni ukuba sichonge kwaye simbe "ii-relics zobukhoboka kunye nekholoni" ezifaka iingcamango zethu, izenzo zemihla ngemihla, ubudlelwane, iintsapho kunye neenkqubo. Ezi nkolelo zobukoloniyali - ezi "zikhumbuzo zembumba" ezigxininisa ukuba abantu abathile banelungelo lokulawula abanye kwaye bathathe imizimba yabo, izixhobo zabo, kwanobomi babo ngokuthanda kwabo - ziyingcambu yobundlobongela obujoliswe kwabasetyhini, ukongama kwabamhlophe kunye nokuchasa ubumnyama. 

    Uhlalutyo lukaNksz Jordan luhambelana neminyaka engama-38 yamava esebenza namadoda. Kumagumbi ethu okufundela, asifundi ilungelo lokuthobela kubafazi nabantwana. Kwaye, kumagumbi ethu okufundela, abo kuthi bangabamhlophe abangafundanga banelungelo lokuhoywa, ukusebenza, kunye nokuthobela abantu abaNtsundu kunye nabantu bebala. Amadoda kunye nabantu abamhlophe bafunda eli lungelo kuluntu kunye nezithethe zentlalo ezenziwa zingabonakali ngamaziko asebenza ngokunyamekela amadoda amhlophe.

    UNks. Jordan ucacisa iziphumo ezibi, zanamhlanje zocalucalulo ngokwesini kumaziko kunye nobuhlanga kubafazi abaMnyama. Unxulumanisa ubukhoboka kunye noloyiko olufunyanwa ngabasetyhini abaMnyama kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu namhlanje, kwaye ubonisa indlela ukuchasana noBuNtsundu okuzifaka ngayo kwiinkqubo zethu, kuquka nenkqubo yezomthetho yolwaphulo-mthetho, ngeendlela ezijongela phantsi kwaye zibeke emngciphekweni abasetyhini abaNtsundu.

    Ezi ziinyaniso ezinzima kuninzi lwethu. Asifuni ukuyikholelwa le nto ithethwa nguNkszn Jordan. Enyanisweni, siqeqeshelwe kwaye sihlala sihlala singamameli amazwi akhe kunye namanye amabhinqa aNtsundu. Kodwa, kuluntu apho ukongama kwabamhlophe kunye nokuchasana noBumnyama kujongela phantsi amazwi amabhinqa aNtsundu, kufuneka simamele. Ekumameleni, sijonge ukufunda indlela eya phambili.

    Njengoko uNksz Jordan ebhala, “Siza kukwazi ukuba ubulungisa bukhangeleka njani xa sisazi ukuba sibathanda njani abantu abaMnyama, ngakumbi abafazi abaNtsundu…Khawube nomfanekiso-ngqondweni wehlabathi apho amabhinqa aMnyama aphilisayo aze enze iinkqubo zokwenene zenkxaso noxanduva lokuphendula. Khawube nomfanekiso-ngqondweni wamaziko enziwe ngabantu abathembisa ukuba ngabaququzeleli ekulweni inkululeko yabaMnyama nobulungisa, kwaye bazibophelele ekuqondeni isiseko esinesiseko sezopolitiko zokutyala. Khawufane ucinge, okokuqala embalini, simenywa ukuba sigqibezele uKwakha kwakhona. ”

    Njengakwiiklasi zethu ze-BIP kunye namadoda, ukubala ngembali yelizwe lethu yokwenzakala kwabasetyhini abaMnyama sisandulela sokutshintsha. Ukumamela, ukuthetha inyaniso kunye nokuphendula zizinto ezifunekayo zobulungisa kunye nokuphilisa, okokuqala kwabo benzakele kakhulu kwaye, ekugqibeleni, kuthi sonke.

    Asinakuyitshintsha de sibe siyiqambe igama.